Not Taking it for Granted

We went to the Common on Saturday. On a normal weekend, a very ordinary, everyday thing. Now, it was the furthest I’d been from the house since early March. It seems just incredible that a place I used to go nearly every week is now a carefully planned outing. The walk there was terrifying – too many people on the pavements, street furniture rearing up and children careering away from us on scooters.

But when we got there, and the space opened out before me, we were on safe ground – the tarmac paths had mowed verges meaning you could safely pass other people with plenty of distance, and as we crossed the common, the familiar vista opened up before me – and I almost cried from relief at seeing such a beloved view again.

There was strangeness, still – no benches to sit on, no cafe, people in hi-vis ‘moving on’ those sat on the grass – but it made me more aware than ever that I never did ‘take it for granted’. I am as grateful for that view now as I was at the beginning – it’s no surprise the common was one of the first places I wrote about, and that I love particularly because I saw it the very first day I came to view the old house. It won me over then, and it has never lost its lustre.

Back in February I took the photo above – a bright cold day when I was a month into running – I stopped then and took this photo to celebrate the end of a good run on such a lovely day, and had a little moment of thankfulness that I had this glorious space on my doorstep. If you had said to me then that I wouldn’t be able to go there as often as I like, just a few weeks later – I wouldn’t have believed it – but still, I would say, I never took it for granted. When I was house hunting, I chose green space over proximity to the Tube, and I’ve never regretted it, and never will take it for granted.

Other things I don’t take for granted – the tulips I planted last autumn, how glad I am I took the effort to plant them.

Every day I am a little bit thankful for them – they are looking so glorious, and setting off the raised bed at its most beautiful time of year, with the bluebells just out and everything else looking its best.

Finally, when I read the comments from people who say ‘I’ll never take sitting in a cafe for granted again’ I want to say ‘I’ve never taken it for granted’ – nothing has ever been quite as much of a simple pleasure for me as sitting in a cafe with a coffee, by myself (yes, introverts R US, OK I also like sitting in a cafe with my family too…).

I miss it. I don’t know when we’ll be able to do it again. But I don’t ever take it for granted.

Notes from a Lockdown Garden

I’m nearly at the end of the second week of homeschooling in Corona Life, but I’ve been mostly housebound for closer to a month already. The day after World Book Day (what feels like the last ‘normal day’ in my memory) one child got a sick bug, then the second got it, then finally we got hit by chicken pox.

This took the small girl out of school a full week before the real closedown happened – terribly sad for her to miss her friends a week ahead of the rest of them, and the last chance to spend time with her reception teachers – but luckily she didn’t get the pox badly and we had a fun week pottering in the garden and playing board games. This eased me into what was coming next, the real thing, both kids at home and housebound and me teaching them. The most unlikely and surreal prospect – but by the end of that week, I just wanted them home and safe and indoors.

Picking up the big girl from school on the last day was the hardest of all – only 11 of them left in the class, and she cried, and I cried, and I dreaded the first weekend of not being able to go anywhere or sit in a cafe or pop to the library or any of the usual weekend things. But I had ordered a big batch of bedding plants to cheer up myself and the garden.

Primula, forget-me-nots, heather, hyacinth, alpines and campanula all gave me something to focus on during that first week. I also had seeds and fairy gardens for the girls to plant, but they were happier making mud pies and avoiding school work those first few days.

By the end of week one of homeschooling, chicken pox struck a second time, and much harder on the older child – we had a thoroughly miserable day and went into a chilly unspringlike weekend – so going out for a daily permitted walk was out of the question, even if we’d wanted to.

Luckily, after two horrid days, the worst of the pox was done, and in week 2 at home we settled into a proper routine – Joe Wicks workout, quiet reading time while I shower, school work till 11 when we break to watch Maddie Moate’s science show, more work, lunch, online mindfulness class at 2pm for the big girl, more work, story time, play.

The work from the teachers for Y3 is well structured and well within her means, but pleasing a reception child is harder. She doesn’t get the messy play and playground time she gets at school, and there’s less work set for her to do; if I start playing a game with her I’ll distract the big girl – and week 2 was much colder so less time spent in the garden. Zoom chats with smaller kids are confusing and upsetting, and just leave her sad. I need to do more to cheer her up, but she does, luckily, love helping out in the kitchen and garden.

Little nature lesson – we found a caterpillar mysteriously appeared on our sofa!

We are heading into the Easter holidays and now the isolation will really hit home – no days out, no parks or museums, no play dates, no farm trips to see lambs. It looks like the weather will improve, so we’ll get those seeds planted and give the girls all the fresh air they need, but I think I’ll miss the school routine (though perhaps they won’t!)

I have my own small private space, too, I still run, first thing, whilst the girls finish breakfast and get dressed (the Mr is at home now, of course, and he goes out on his bike at lunch, so he gets a little break, too) – I go up and down our side return for 25 mins or so, and then have breakfast and then do 20 mins of Joe Wicks – it feels like my day has already peaked by 10am! I have to work on not slumping in the afternoon.

What’s been eating my primroses?

What’s been good? Just being with the children, with no agenda than to get the work done, more or less. With day trips and cafe lunches and playgrounds and swimming off the agenda, I can actually just hang out with them and enjoy observing them learning. It’s a privilege to have that opportunity, even in these circumstances. And a joy to see them play together, as they clearly still adore each other and have a fantasy world all of their own that they disappear into. I am glad to have their company and I am so glad they have each other.

What’s not so good? Missing my own work, as it gradually slows down, and I lack the motivation to sit down and work in the evening. Don’t mind so much about the lack of human contact, as I’m a solitary soul anyway and happy to WhatsApp and email rather than have to speak to anyone. My own time, the time to walk without agenda or direction, to think – because the news presses in too deeply to give me the peace of mind to think freely, even when I try to avoid it.

But still, we have spring, and blossom, and the garden is going to get so thoroughly gardened these next two weeks, it won’t know what’s hit it.